I kind of feel like guidos are mythical creatures.
its all coming back to me in waves....waves of humiliation and nausea.
Uhh, there's a legit bruise on my boob.. Again how does he manage this
I just found the gloves and lightbulb I stole. Did you pee on a ATM inside a bank?
Worst part of blacking out... Waking up and having to do the teeth check
think he just told me if I need to shit I should go outside.
I found his Linkedin the day after he created it. Too stalkerish or just right?
I like literally had a visual image of his penis going into your soul
I think Facebook knows you fucked me. All of a sudden I get everything you do in my news feed.
You're right. I woke up today with my ugly sweater still on and no pants. I'd say it was a successful night.
So apparently I twerked on my coworkers last night. One month at the new job n I guess this is how I'm getting to know people
I feel like I don't show you my boobs enough. And you deserve to see them like all the time
long story short, the bouquet was used as a sacrificial torch
I came so hard my entire leg seized. Her blowjob gave me a Charlie horse.
Neighbor just came over and asked if I had anything to clean blood out of carpet... it's definitely time to move.
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