My mind says no, but my body says yes.
What does your body say about chlamydia?
how do chicks with those acryllic nails wipe their anuses?
You were so drunk last night you thought you force pushed the automatic door open.
well i did feel guilty about it. until i saw how hot the guy was the next day. now, nothing but pride.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I drew a venn diagram at the top of my final comparing stuff i know and stuff on the test.
making a list of all the places we've peed. separate list of places we peed when we were stoned
I only saw you for about 5 min, but you were rambling about how not even the whiskey could make you fight the skeleton guards.
He's like the unplanned child of drunkenness
The reign of the rally queen is over. Welcome to the age of the walking dead.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ps I'm glad our relationship hasn't progressed into having to get married so we legally can't testify against each other
My new dealer was watching Space Jam and eating ham off a frisbee when I went over. He's my new favorite person
He called me piss drunk at 7:30pm while cooking bacon and said he was going to bed. I don't think he's taking it well.
17. The number of times my one night stand told me he loved me.
so in other words, they broke and fell off and I ate a gummy life saver off of his balls
He made me ask permission to to cum and it made me cum.
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