I swear she didn't look like that last week.
Do you ever think God made girls unattractive around their periods as a warning?
He is an equal opportunity slut.
I am so stoned and my professor is handing out candy. I love Halloween.
Don't tits with veins remind you of road maps?
The Swedes wanted a tensome.
She's grinding on a deaf black man and I'm the interpreter.
Between the dance party in the car and the distraction of the momma bear and two cubs im a cops wet dream roght now when comes to wreckless driving.
This hobo said he can't buy alcohol bc he got in trouble bc a girl sat on his face when he was passed out and misaligned his spine and gave him Alzheimer's so Ali is buying him a bottle. This is Vegas.
He's an acquired taste, like S&M or those crunchy things they put in salads
Croutons?
i feel like when you brought up the possibility of you getting pregnant the sexting is over
Pretty sure the waitress here is concerned about well being bc I've been here drinking by myself for 3 hours. If only I could show here FB so she'd know I'm not alone...
WHY THE FUCK DOES RICKY'S BROTHER GET AN ENTIRE POT OF PASTA FOR BEING SHIRTLESS AND ALL I GET IS ARRESTED?!
I just made the same noise looking at my salami sandwich as I do hooking up with you.
In a meeting I sneezed and my tooth hit the floor. I don't think anyone noticed. I would still like to die now.
Randomize
