The look your mother gives you when she sees you masterbating on web cam is unlike any I've seen before, but this is a case where, I would say, ignorance is bliss.
I was happy to be the center of attention..until i realized why everyone was staring
i just made a girl do the walk of shame. as a bumblebee. i love halloween.
you sang the finger bang song from south park while fingering me. needless to say, kind of a turn off.
So I made him an imaginary sandwich and told him that the day I didn't have to fake it, neither would he.
His appology was" look at it this way, at least you'll give better head without those teeth.'
they described our state of being as looking similar to a crime scene....you were on the ground and i was running around screaming.
Taking shots out of pine wood derby trophiesssssss. best idea ever.
hey watch out, they threw flour on everyone who passed out at their party last year.
I find it ironic...the gays are dying to get married & I just want a fucking divorce
Giving you good advice and being naked are not mutually exclusive.
We got a standing ovation as security was escorting us out of the ballpark, it was a proud moment
I guess your brother-in-law will have his day in the sun tonight after you leave. By that, I of course, mean he's gonna suck liquor milk out your sister's tits.
No I need this job. I actually contemplated buying a vibrator with my dad's credit card the other night.
Adulthood is putting your bongs in the dishwasher because you're too lazy to clean them manually.
Are you ok dude?
Randomize
