We are walking down to the lake and then i dont know. Where did you sleep?
Places.
Plural? Please tell.
I was so drunk last night that I went into my 15 year old sisters room to have her peer edit the drunk texts I was sending to my ex.
you need to know that there is a kid here wearing an i mosh for Jesus shirt
He's still filling me in on the details. mid-table dance i asked to go water skiing?
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She had one drink in her cleavage and another in her hand. She kept rotating between the two by leaning backward and then sipping the one in her hand.
You just kept screaming at everyone 'not to break your scarf' and doing somersaults
I can't figure out if I'm dying from all of the booze still in my system, or from the cement wall.
And is it bad that I haven't talked to guys who I haven't already dated? I feel like a recycle bin.
It doesn't matter how many beers you've had, it's unacceptable to piss in someone's helmet after a playoff win.
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Lmao I should put that ad on Craigslist "in need of muscular and determined team of men to carry drunken birthday whore safely home"
So I'm never gonna get to see you again?
Hopefully.
I got outsmarted by a door tonight. Twice.
My co-worker accidentally texted me regarding the threesome him and other one are planning.
her idea of a romantic time is a bottle of jager, some Guacamole and chips.
can't go wrong with guac.
I think/hope James is drunk. He's standing in the front lawn loudly declaring "I AM a popsicle!" Over and over....
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