If you liked it then you shoulda put your dick in it, oh uh uh oh
My ferret is drunk. Someone told me you'd know what to do?
she might purposely get aids just to give it to you. I think she might hate you that much.
You are the worst kind of disappointment. The responsible kind.
Trying to grind with crutches was not a success
Just received a visit from the Ghost of Bad Decisions Past. Kind of weird 90% of the flashbacks happened in the same sixteen month span, the rest happened at Taco Bell.
Challenge: Try to have your balls hanging out in every picture you take tonight
Challenge Accepted
HOW ARE YOU ALWAYS DRUNK? AND WHERE ARE TOU TRYING TO GO??
Breaking into his house to steal the sheets I'd drunk pissed on before he got home was not how I wanted to be spending spring break
I want to go out and have good clean fun.
Ok, but that does not include Bud Light Platinum and your vagina.
He was too drunk, and my mother and I ended up babysitting him. He told her I have amazing mouth skills, and that I love the "chorizo" he feeds me. All she said was "And on the list of 30 things you never want to hear about your daughter..." while gripping the steering wheel.Please just fucking kill me now.
I'm not finished with being a sloppy white girl alcoholic. I didn't postpone having a husband and kids for sober weekends.
we went to go get waffles and then i sucked his dick in a parking lot. average tuesday.
my gynecologist gave me a high 5 for not getting any STD's since my last visit and said "Way to go Annabeth!" you have twenty seconds to get to my level
You have to commit to sexting. You can't just quit right after I send you pictures of my asshole.
Seriously, come on.
I feel like there's a picture of my ass on the internet right now.
I hate you.
Randomize
