He introduced her to the DMA meeting by saying: in the past few years i've never seen someone work so hard for so little success
Spotted at kelly concert- 10 year old in a homemade "I do not hook up" t shirt. Well I should certainly hope not, sweetheart.
i just carried on a conversation with my mother from another room mid-ejaculation. you would have done the same
We were sexting and at the end, instead of us having sex, he decided to put "we fell asleep in each others arms."
i love beer. I convinced myself that I'm going to ace the exam tomorrow. I can't even do that when I actually study.
like we started out all organized and composed and within thirty mins people were throwing up in the bushes, arguing over a beer bong and jumping in the pool with their clothes on
is that a crab cake on the shelf with the dvd's....?
You defs just slept for 6 hours in a porta pottie. You should probably just kill yourself.
my friend thinks you're hot & wants to fuck you ps i'm my friend
Actually it's really just going to be me drunk in your living room swinging from a pole on a tuesday morning.
Can I interview you during sex or would that be weird?
I just noticed that pic of your cock has a Christmas tree in the background. It's July.
I described my life as a 7 layer cake of death
I resent the implication of a jizz addiction
She picked a quarter off the floor, kissed it "for luck" and won the $20,000 jackpot. She bought dinner and stayed sober to drive us home. This is a typical example of a visit with my sister.
Randomize
