I'm so over stopping myself from talking about my sexual experiences in front of children.
Just saw 30+ dicks. Explain later.
Someone wrote Kyle's bitch on me too. I dont even know who Kyle is.
Preparing for wine wednesday. How would you feel about improvising and starting a white russian wednesday tomorrow instead? you know, shake things up a bit.
Nothing like a marijuana chart of usage in each country to make me understand math.
I go to a class slightly intoxicated and they bring in a baby. What a life.
No im just getting a road beer. You got my pants?
The problem with that is that my car has been stolen
I just hit on a guy in a doughnut store... is that too suggestive?
I'm sitting on my couch eating a bag of marshmallows and watching someone run bare ass down the street. What has happened to my life?
I just delete my bank app from my phone to have enough storage to download tindr. Is this my life now?
Guy just walked into the bathroom with only socks on and took a 5second shit. It is taking me longer to type this than for him to shit, wash hands, and leave the bathroom. WTF? Still wondering why he only had socks on.
I'm sober now, I ate a whole cantaloupe.
I just bought spray paint, a T-shirt, and a box of magnum condoms. The cashier refused to make eye contact! Haha
I think my time would be better spent seducing the TA then trying to save this paper.
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