I dont need to watch it. And stop comparing your life to Entourage.
I wanna tell red shirt guy I'm pregnant and use the abortion money for Coachella.
I don't know what he sees in her. All I see are horrible pancake nipples
He's hungover and at the neighbour's garage sale negotiating a price for a tuba.
Whatever, the fact of the matter is that I saved you from poorly planned outdoor sex by doing a rain dance and you should totally thank me.
another part of my inner child died when i emptied my crayon bank for dollar beer night.
Hey. Be honored that I consider you the genital expert. I know alot of candidates for the position.
Me. blonde. Sex. Dance floor.
I just won a riveting game of "who can drink the most vodka out of a hollowed out watermelon". Fucking New Yorkers.
I just windexed my mirror headboard, Lets get to work.
My mom just gave me my fake back to buy her more wine.
I woke up to realize my keys were on the front porch. Also so was I. So close yet so far
Sex should not remind me of how baby birds get fed
A guy claiming to be the Japanese counterpart to the White Power Ranger is trying to take me home....
My liver can't handle being unemployed!
Randomize
