fun fact: cucumber in vinegar with pepper = best ever high snack
Let's just say there's a reason that "suede" rhymes with "laid".
Fact: The drinking you do in college doesn't affect your liver in real life.
I just made a moltov cocktail out of lubricant and a christmas bulb. The fire is still going strong. MERRY CHRISTMAS
I'm to the point in my high that every song eventually turns into Lady Gaga
Plus, I've always wanted to drive in rush hour with a huge cock drawn on my hood
Just had the "whores are people too" talk with Mom. Bright side it's Christmas, and I may have been drunk, I don't think she caught on.
I'm all dressed in my outfit from last night, and I'm not even the sluttiest person in Walmart right now. God bless Miami.
We broke up. And I told him he better give me my fucking star wars movies tomorrow. Priorities.
Ultimate fat girl moment: I promised him my mouth for the night if he bought me a funnel cake..
When you wake up on the bus on 139th but you're staying at 6th
133 to go
my confident boosted when he told me that it was I who started making out with him. ME. NOT HIM.
I AM SHOCKED AND PROUD OF MYSELF
I'm serenading his dick with my words. I understand how poets get inspiration now.
There's a Japanese guy here dressed as a Viking who just screamed "wats up cocksluts" and kicked a guy in the face. come get me out of here.
Ya know. I was thinking of my slutty moments the other day and finally know which one makes the number 1 spot.
Randomize
