I've never had a man I enjoyed more than steak
After I made out with her she fell asleep and started pooting in her sleep. Are we sure lesbians are hot? Cause that wasn't.
my last 3 google searches were anal itchy vagina and ice cubes
The smartest thing I've heard Obama do is call Kayne West a jackass
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I've replaced the bottom of the food pyramid with alcohol.
I hid 4 bags of cocaine in your house. Have fun finding them
I'm 99% sure I high fived a girl over mashed potatoes last night
How could you not be happy? Its like "and then I found 5 dollars" but "and then I found a handle of vodka"
he told her to call him "Frog Legs" and she still fucked him and not you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So I'm thinking next semester you should be my own personal maid, nurse, masseuse and chef in exchange for free lodging, any food you can find, and unlimited access to my reproductive organs.
For thanksgving we are only drinking wild turkey for the next 24hrs time to strap your balls back on and maybe a helmet
Ps we bought 8 pellet guns just now
Some guy named spider just bought me 5 shots
She said I'm going to get you stoned and have you fuck me on the couch.
I don't know what happened last night. But I just woke up in the high school boiler room
I plan on getting so intoxicated, that I think it's MY own birthday
Can I play this game?
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