I stood up and a chip flew out of my shirt and landed in the chip dish. I just walked away.
the people of mcdonalds are all starring at me & this dude like they know we just slept together
is not sure whether or not everyone at the club last night calling me a-easy is a good thing?
i swear to god her finding her clit was like looking for a sock in a dryer full of beach towels
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you do realize eating doritos and gatorade as a breakfast hangover cure is only acceptable for one more month - then we have to grow up
You coming out tonight? We gotta hang out before I move to Madison. BTW I'm moving to Madison.
its barely noon and he already threw up and i have second degree burn
Such a good question, let's ask the alcohol gods for the answer.
It's supposed to be a shit show, it's an end of the world party.
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And now we should drink to that moment where you realize you didn't exactly think things through.
She gave you a handy in the bar and you were surprised she was good with a dick?
Hahah good point
but, alas, I am not the lady in the streets. I'm simply the freak in the sheets.
I'm going to have to go for it. It's like Mt. Everest. It's large and unpredictable but I live for adventure and it's worth never coming back from. Mt. BigDick.
Will exercising make me less horny?
May have told my history professor I wanted him to stuff me like a turkey. Too slutty?
Nah, people appreciate the creativity of seasonal sluttiness. Let me know if it works!!!
Randomize