That's what you get for not wearing a bra and jumping on a trampoline
My drunk dialing habit needs to go. My drunk habit can stay though.
How young is too young to ask my kid to make me a drink?
is wine microwaveable?
She challenged me to a game of rock-paper-scissors for her virginity. I love this girl.
dont get me wrong, i like when a guy is into my boobs but when he started saying mama i want milk let me suck, i gathered my shit together and bounced.
and i'm pretty sure he drank the lava lamp
5am is far to early to be on jagerbomb number 6 right now
It's cheaper then a lap dance and you get your hair cut.
It's all good. The CSI guy came and I played the theme song while he in was in our place. The cops even laughed.
We're going to catch a squirrel this summer
After I'd been making out with her for a good 15 minutes some guy yelled "grab this chicks beer she needs both hands!" And he was right I did need both: god bless jello wrestling.
It's the warm chocolate goeyness of a brownie combined with the heavenly taste of weed-smell... Why have I never done this before?
The last thing I remember is talking to the firefighter next to me and he was giving me fruit.
Three cans of beer can fit in the shower catty... multi tasking
Randomize
