how do you wash the taste of whore out of your mouth?
He's been dancing to the same Rob Thomas album in his room for almost 8 hours now. Please never, ever bring extacy over here again.
And just when I was about to fall asleep, he hit me in the face, and claimed he's a "violent sleeper".
Found out that it IS actually possible to get road head from somebody in the back seat
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EVERYONE CAN HEAR YOU FUCKING YOU ARE IN A TENT
he broke off your car antennae to use as a walking stick before he smoked because he claimed to lack the facial strength needed to open his eyes when he's high
Lesson of the night: never take shots out of a bottle you found under a couch in a frat house. I have no idea where I am
okay when i look at this i can see it on the future news along with the headline "picture scandal involving senatorial candidate sexually harassing drunken idiot in what appears to be a pink room of pain"
I fell in the river last night. The allegheny to be exact. Omg getting drunk at work gatherings is dangerous
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Last night turned out to be an expensive trip to your house between the ticket and the plan b. (Well I haven't gotten that yet)
I woke up and my backpack was empty. He used me for sex, and back to school supplies.
As she came, she moaned Roll Tide. I kid you not.
well, shes hot as hell, but she does keep saying she's the president of the loch ness monster's fan club, so that's kinda a red flag...
Last time i cooked this high i tried to makw bacon amd then burned myselfbon the grill, only to realize 25min latwr when the bacon wouldnt cook that the grill wasn't on. I IMAGINED the burn.
The abomination is in progress. At least one barista side eyed me and the other has fear in her eyes
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