Is pulling weed out of a vagina a good thing or a bad thing?
I just had my first experience getting hit on by a guy. It was really awkward, he touched my chest and invited me to a gay bar because "women get drunk and let their guard down at gay bars"
thats actually pretty good logic
I really hope that wasn't actually his first time. Because if my first time was anything like that I would NEVER have sex again.
You know, I never expected to find myself with a roommate who I'd have to ask not to have sex while I'm in the room. And yet, here we are.
Her mom offered to give me a lap dance. I was a guest, I couldn't say no.
She is high at the bar - she thinks the bottle of frangelico is aunt jemima telling her to stop doing drugs.
I refuse to have sex with you and your eBay condoms.
I need to stop drinking and eating and start working out. I look like the lovechild of John Goodman and Jabba the Hutt.
Also we saw a clown getting arrested. Rochester is weird.
I swear to god he's making pineapple onions and cheese. He thinks he's making eggs onions and cheese
There is a reason my most meaningful relationship since 2012 has been with Duracel...
Btw, you owe me. One (1) orgasm.
I told him we can’t see each other today because absence makes the heart grow fonder but mostly I just need to rest my vag
I cannot believe all 4 of us had sex at the same time, in the same bed... And it didn't turn into a foursome..
I told him to take his man panties off and take the fucking Jaeger bomb already, so no to a 2nd date
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