you dont have to exercise, you threw up last night!
I woke up this morning naked, with a to-go box from Qdoba, an entire meal completely untouched. I have been piecing together my night to find some answers. I feel like Nancy Drew.
dude you apologized to her after she called you stupid. you were like "no i'm sorry, you shouldn't have to be around stupid people, it's my fault"
so we were pounding it out and someone knocked on the wall and was shouting at us
that didnt stop you
nope
and yes, the jail cell in Citi Field does have a big Mets symbol in it
dude, i have to cancel tonight, my neighbor just bought a goat
who knew that a girl that let me piss on her within 20 minutes of meeting her would get upset i couldn't remember her name.
His band may suck, but it's not like I'm sleeping with all of them.
Idk. I woke up marinating in beer on my beanbag. Idk what you mightve done.
She keeps feeding me drugs. Its like I'm her baby bird or something
Can you get the drug form of snow for the blizzard this weekend?
I can't even masturbate without crying fuck this break up
Did I just hear you ask Siri about the meaning of life?
There is an unwrapped tampon, a condom, a rubber chicken and a slim Jim currently sitting on our dining room table.
I don't even remember what dignity looks like anymore. I JUST WANTED TO ROAST SOME POTATOES
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