I'm kindof freaked out about my cock not getting up this morning. Cove over later so I can sort this out. Do not post this on texts from last night.
Damn that would have been a great one. Hahah and don't worry...
i just met rob pattinson in italy. he's so stupid, i feel like i would have to say "your penis goes here!"
is it weird that i feel like i won the break up because my status change got two comments and his got zero?
can you explain how you are here for one night and now my kitchen table is in 11 pieces..
we've had our differences but let's set them aside, go home and fuck
The only thing I remember is vomiting and then feeding my dog a Mcdonalds cheeseburger and telling him yolo
You called me and said "Aidan's unconscious" to which he said "I'm conscious, I'm conscious pilot"
He was filled with the holy spirit. And vodka.
Dammit now I'm pissed. Its like I am torn between two worlds. A world of girls, and a world of people punching other people in the head. Both are just so beautiful.
I seriously want to say to him "Do you know how many blow jobs you could have gotten this summer?"
He's like a unicorn and I just wanna domesticate him
Hell no. Last time I used a Slip N Slide I ended up with bruised ribs, a broken fence and the hatred of a half naked girl with a sprained wrist.
So far my survey results are telling me to pawn the ring. Thoughts?
And today, on Faces I'd Like to Sit On .... The starting line up of the German National Football team
Let me atleast have my coffee before you start talking about your penis
Well, you started screaming "I dont know you GO AWAY" to your mom when she was holding your hair as you threw up in her garden.
Randomize
