i'm smoking hookah in a kayak. how did this happen.
Dude, she looked like the Canadian Slam Poet, neck hair and all.
Happy graduation...we are now officially unemployed alcoholics!
Wouldn't be the first time..I think there's a subliminal message constantly playing in my mind that says 'blackout', 'throwing up is fun' 'too sober'
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whatever. i don't care. i just want to be drunk wrapped in an american flag.
I heard liver failure is in for 2012 anyways
I've been timing it. He's been showering alone for 33 minutes. 4 minutes ago, he said "truth or dare." haven't heard anything since.
Are we talking about who knows if I'll get naked pictures of you with a broadsword or who knows if I'll be surprised?
Passing out on a toilet is not classy no matter what you're wearing. Not even a pea coat.
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There's a whistle here and I just want to play my whistle song on it.
I got into the shower with my underwear on. I just sat down in the tub and tried to figure out when I lost all control of this hangover.
She just called at a dance party, and you stopped mid puke to join. Another successful night.
It wasn't until I lost my earring that I realized "I've been here before". Turns out we fucked a year ago. We've decided to make it a tradition.
Now, I know I say this a lot, but you've obviously never seen my penis.
I love you so much and not just because your dick is perfect
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