the not having weed thing wouldnt be nearly as tragic if it wasnt the one holiday where they launch bright flaming things into the air
I fuked that chick last night and she kept saying, "oh...oh....oh", like Bill Lumberg
so what did you do?
I did the mash I did the monster mash It was a graveyard smash!
dude, never let a drunk girl playbite your dick. the doctor came in laughed and left.
MRIs the morning after St. Patty's Day was a poor choice.
I think i found piece of your tooth in my dick this morning when i took a shower
I was talking about you wanting my dick, but that works too
I never thought I would be having sex behind a shower curtain that wasn't in a bathroom.
Just to update you. I am dead. So your probably gonna have to find a new roommate
I'm tellin ya, let the nipple get some air, they'll hire u on the spot, lawyers love a little nip
I have to take tonight off from shenanigans. My liver is planning a coup
There is a severe lack of banging on that itinerary... I'd like a revision on my desk within the hour
Just FYI....you totally yelled out Royals while we were having sex last night lol.
Dad hid the hash somewhere in my room and wont tell me where it is until i clean it. My room is spotless. The hash was on the ceiling fan...
Once again I let my vagina make the decisions...that and vodka :(
That’s the third time this month he’s hooked up with a girl by telling her it’s his bachelor party, and he’s not even dating a chick let alone engaged.
Randomize
