i find it sad that i can no longer sit in the back of class for fear that someone will fart into the heater again.
Well, of course, to the untrained eye I look like a slut.
my fraternity brothers just had an intervention for me. i either have a problem or am just on some next-level shit, im gonna go with door number 2
obviously he has no clue about college dating. it goes drunken sex then the 1st date
four loko is officially banned. leave it to the kids from a state school to fuck it up for everyone
He left his own bachelor party to bring me weed. Then smoked with me. Tell me I'm not his favorite-ex-friends-with-benefits.
Tinkerbell just flew up to me and tickled my balls. What the fuck did we smoke?
I think it may of been me pulling down my pants is why she walked away.
I'm like 80% sure we nearly got arrested because we threw fireworks at a car
I'm going to miss hockey season. It was the best excuse to get drunk on a Tuesday night.
My day in three words: secret purse cake
You never know true fear until you're on your period in a house full of white furniture.
Ugh. He got her for secret santa. Idk what to get. Idk what she's into.
... other people's boyfriends.
Hi. I have frying pans taped to my feet. I achave to go the hospital, theyre on pretty tight. Can't feel legs bring me juice
You were drinking tequila through a straw.. and kept waving your arms at me and getting this intense stare down as you muttered something about jedi mind tricks.
Randomize
