He was doing push ups, crunches and jogging in place in front of the restaurant. I'm not too sure I want to eat there if it requires immediate exercise following the meal.
The stories of what you did in Cuba got home before you.
They ran out of vodka so we started doing Body Doritos.
This is even worse then that time I fucked a guy just because he had air conditioning.
It went alright, nothing too special, just got threatened with a knife by our server.
Just got back from fathers day breakfast. So hungover i couldn't eat so i just slipped my food in my pockets and threw it out while i puked in the bathroom.
...And then you kept screaming "cock mouth" in her face every time she tried to talk.
She wanted to to do it on top of a horse, I can't compete with that
it wasnt even considered partying. it was like "ok, who can get the most shitfaced and not pass out"
New wedding record, my shirt was off by 8pm!!!
You put me in such a good mood with that road head, I bought everyone at Hooters donuts.
Seriously I can't get a booty call for some baked goods.
You start to question your party girl tendencies when you're wearing the same shirt you wore the night before to work and you're trying to get last nights Jell-O shot off the sleeve on your way to work
I just made mac at 3:10 am... My life is falling apart...
To get him to come she paid for his uber and promised that someone in the house would give him head. it worked
Randomize
