My eyes are so dilated i literally have night vision right now.
Ill do this for you.
You are a team player.
This is me making up for not putting my tongue inside you more.
Just saw the pics you left in my phone. thanks for reminding me that last night was not a dream.
she thought the capital of kansas was topanga.
i think im the only person who makes thank you cards for their drug dealer
you finished all 5 burgers, started crying tears of joy, and then claimed the tears were actually just 'meat sweats' from your eyes
Oh god I may vomit into the teacup of debauchery.
I kinda got drunk and threw my debit card into a bonfire so I don't have any money at the moment lol.
I don't know. I wanna do you but I also want a cheeseburger.
I fit in backpacks. BOOM HERE I AM! Like a stripper from a cake.
I don't want the fire department to come out here twice in one weekend because of your god damn vape.
Have you ever had a pregnancy test laugh at you?
I walked in..crop dusted the whole place then asked her if she wanted to go to a place that smells better.
You were always a thinker
You'd be proud...I've an early morning wake up booty call...he should be here around 6am ish...I told him to wake me nicely.
Do NOT. I repeat. DO NOT call me little one after we have fucked. In no world is that ok. Even jesus agrees.
Randomize
