Woke up this morning with one boob drawn on to look like the globe. Questionable?
I am full of burrito and curiosity
Would it be inappropriate to do lines in front of the cable guy?
its likemy ribs anf my hesrt aew cuddlingn
is it possible that there's a used condom holding pennies in my bra? I'm so confused on what happened last night...
I was passed out in a dog food bowl tor two hours. Just tapped my dinner beer. I love homecoming.
I still have his teeth marks on the base of my penis. You didnt miss much
I think I'm gonna wear a bikini to our final tomorrow...just so he knows that no fucks will be given on his test
Did I run away from you last night?
Yeah it was a great moment for our friendship
I mean like if I stood up my head might pull me down like an anchor
I just want someone to put their head on my boobs and laugh at my jokes ....
I'll meet you in hell with unlimited boxes of wine though
Idk I've taught my 18 month old how to say nipple so kids aren't all bad
sorry for the late response. was in jail for 6 months.
you never know when your going to find a surprise from me in your bed...it keeps you on your toes.
Randomize
