never let anyone you met on skype borrow your car. lesson learned.
He was a level 5 clinger dude i dont need to be told how ridiculously awesome i am all the time, if so id just hang out with my mom
Studying for the exam.. Identifying the portraits using phrases like "large penis"
He came on me while singing crank dat like soulja boy, fuck our sex life has reached a whole new level of low
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude, we took our shirts off and set our chest hair on fire. That's a low point.
You raise a valid concern
That's all? I'm a pro at gay chicken. I'll touch his dick, I have no problem with that.
So, I'm stoned at his house petting the neighbors cat I made him steal.
You're a fucking train wreck.
My vibrator looks like a lipstick tube. So does my mace. I just realized the potential problems of keeping them both in the same bag.
There are two guys dressed like Spartans from 300 at this bar and they're making out and I needed you to know this
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is there a greeting card for "I can't keep being The Other Woman"?
She had never heard the term "grundle" before. Classiest girl I've met in months
In other news, I just threw up my burrito and am currently on all fours literally crawling back to my bed
man sorry about that. It's like god was willing me to be an asshole. I haven't filled my quota for the day
Just to clarify, i'm coming over for tacos not a threesome
You know you suck at relationships when you are sitting in the airport on Christmas day, alone, swiping on Tinder.
Randomize