i'm writing my speech about my 4th grade backstreet boy concert experience. that sums up how seriously i take my life.
every time i get drunk at her place i end up leaving with nothing but an empty box of toaster strudels..
I hope so. I just start to question my lifestyle when i pee on coffee tables
It got kind of awkward when her dad brought home a 20 something asian girl at 3am
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He came over while I was in the ER and hung pictures of himself around my house.
my resolution for 2011 is to fuck him whenever he wants it. this year I'm going above and beyond the call of booty.
4 random people called me telling me they found him sleeping in the fetal postion on a driveway 45 minutes after we lost him
these marshmallows taste like mayonnaise. like playing tetris on a gameboy, that's what these marshmallows mean.
What the fuck could you be doing in that room to make her yell "Beginners Luck!" over and over again?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She was grinding on him and then she was eating a Big Mac. Who the hell brings a Big Mac to the club?
Drunk Jeff aka Dreff thinks he's about 3x cooler than be really is and about 100x better at dancing than he really is
That guy has been pretty randomly in and out of my vagina for 4 years...I don't think I'm required to tell him when I'm dating.
Good point.
I'm gonna have to shit in a bar again tonight
Yesterday we were fuck buddies and today I'm meeting his mom. That escalated quickly.
Im crying watching 9/11 footage eating spray can cheese in my pajamas.
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