kill, fuck, marry: alice cullen, hermione granger, ginny weasley.
damn... fuck alice for sure, I feel bad but i think I have to say marry ginny... and kill hermoine! I can't believe I'm answering this right now.
the girl next to me in class just threw up in a waterbottle during our exam.
Def ran into my elementary school babysitter at the grocery store. Still hot. And she complimented my beer choice. It feels good to still have her approval
She told me to stay away from him cause apparently he fucks anything that walks. clearly i responded with..."i walk"
We learned a lot about one another. I showed him around the town I grew up in and he informed me that he has had a threesome and killed a cat
I will be your sherpa up the mountain of gayness
Did you blow the guy you weren't supposed to hook up with again in the bathroom of pita pit? Cause that happened last night...
Having a vagina does not stop me from believeing my balls are bigger than yours.
She sucks. And I almost hooked up with a clown last night
. Drop what your doing. Were going to Knoxville for midget wrestling. It's the championship.we can NOT miss this.
Trying to decide who to DD on the fourth and I came up with a Who's who of guys I've hooked up with in the last month. Not an ideal situation, but I have a feeling it's gonna happen anyway.
some guy had a sword and everyones crying..it turned bad..fast.
I'm sorry about the fire. I was too fucked up to do science, apparently.
I know you think you’re ready to graduate but just keep these things in mind: taxes, I get up at 5 AM every morning, I have to buy vegetables when I go grocery shopping, and I can’t wear sweat pants to work. Take that victory lap and enjoy the sweat pants and bar hopping because it goes downhill real quick.
I gave him one of my famous hand jobs.
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