I tried to gradually lead her into my room but she wouldn't stop crying and quoting memoirs of a geisha
We didn't go..parents came home with patron wanting to play drinking games --we asked no questions
the best job he will get is a sex ed teacher in alabama
no i decided against it. savin my coke binge for finals week.
If I don't throw up the day I graduate i'll feel like the last 4 years and thousands of dollars spent on alcohol will have been wasted.
We found him sitting in a beach chair in the basement storage room passed out. Idk if we should move him or pass the bowl around.
New wedding record, my shirt was off by 8pm!!!
Is that a polar bear? You seriously grinded with a polar bear at the club?
He interrupted me giving him head to ask if I were hungry, because he wanted to eat pizza. Wtf.
Yes. Ice cream tacos are an important aspect in the bridge of friendship
My apologies. I'll try not to let my dick interfere with official work duties in the future.
Just bought plan b at 8am. Then the cashier asked if I wanted to donate to the children's miracle network. Fml
You know you're more responsible when you turn down your bed and make a clear path to it before you go out..
Apparently I drunkenly told him I was going to ride him to the rodeo and break him like a bronco, then I stole his nachos and beer. Adulting is hard!!!
I'm drinking because I just started here and every single person I work with wants to quit and when I asked a coworker how she's doing she literally just started crying.
Randomize
