I think men at large are the problem in most or all relationships. It's like trying to drag a three-legged retarded puppy through an obstacle course
I have one thing to say: spongebath.
I wish that wasn't all you had to say. And by that, I mean I wish you hadn't said that at all.
found a new level of pathetic. i watched a guy pick out cigarette butts from a jar that weren't completely finished. make sure you go somewhere in life.
Having him eat chocolate out of you is not as romantic as it sounds. I'm still finding pieces.
ya i found him eventually. hes the only one who drinks guiness so I just had to follow the darkest green puke trail
Lost another pound. Switching from beer to hard liquor did this body good.
She came to the party dressed as slutty elmo and then called me oscar the grouch for not wanting to bang her in the dumpster outside.
she is way to in-touch with her childhood
I deem it safe for us to drink together again.
They dropped the charges?
Yeppers. Come drink beers.
no you're not allowed back
come on. everbeers was a great idea. you fucks had a great night
Those two lesbians inspired me. A whole new way to roll. Fuck shots. Gallons of vodka is the new tequila.
Two big black bouncers picked you up and escorted you to the elevator.
I didn't even do anything wrong. For all they knew I could have been on the US Olympic Gymnastic team. Would they kick Gabby Douglas out of a bar? I don't think so.
Like we just had a bunch of sex and then he threaded my eyebrows in bed lol. It was amazing
I'm not sure when I will get off this toilet at work but it's not looking promising
Is it something I'm going to want to hug you for or slap you for?
Just got an email from match.com trying to match me with My ex..I nearly pissed myself laughing
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