Omg! Love it! Cant find L*****
What!!?? Like after last night you lost her?
Yea me and L***** came back to out hotel at 3am to regroup then went back out; police and 2 bars later, I don't know what happened. Vegas is nuts!
She spent a lot of time to get her cleavage to look that good. It would be rude not to stare. It shows you are paying attention. Chicks dig that.
yeah, that's what i said too. right before i tackled that street sign.
He burst into tears while I was blowing him. NEVER giving a bj for a graduation present again.
It says a lot about how well I know you when I can understand messages of yours that say things like "sauteed Jesus."
She had another shot and asked if I wanted to taste her tongue ring. Then I helped her pee.
Do you think if you have sex with a girl twin, her twin brother feels it to? Woke up at her house and they both have a look of disappointment on their faces.
Please save me from this creative non fiction class. I just wrote a paper about how I spend unhealthy amounts of time with my cat.
I spend unhealthy amounts of time watching RuPaul's Drag Race.
I referred to the cat as amicable.
ok thanks goodnight
Also before you go to bed i just have to get it out there that i really like macklemore as a person
My snow day: told Cam, "we're not dating today, we're just roommates." No bra, boxers, drinking whiskey by myself for the past 2 hours, yelling at The Ultimate Fighter reruns from 3 years ago.
He wants to make me arch my back "like I'm having an exorcism". Not sure if I'm turned on or freaked out.
Do you knowhow much it sucks to puke in an automatic toilet? Not fun.
Ew.
It takes talent let's just say that
I don't care. It's wine Wednesday get your gameface on.
I admire the fact that you replicated my apartment on the roof but I would appreciate it more if you would move all my stuff off the roof and back into my apartment.
I want to strut with the confidence of a pigeon.
Randomize
