Third unemployed latin in my bed this week. I'm on a roll
Its alot easier to hide alcohol when your wearing a toga..
everythings easier when your wearing a toga.
i just threw up in the porta potty. i am in no condition to be guarding anyone's life rite now.
it was one of those movies netflix should have sent weed with
You were sad because he was "taking it out on the plant"
And then he told me he just wanted me to hold his cock while we watched tv...
Brought him brownies before taking his pants off. I'm like the Martha fucking Stewart of booty calls. Walk of shame be damned.
Only three months past my 21st and I'm done. So many life lessons in so little time.
Great sex, the promise of us mixing our excellent genetics in the future, and access to drugs are mainly what's holding this relationship together at the moment
We have a little not a lot. We already rolled a blunt and named him Ron.
Is offering to blow your HR rep considered an ethics violation?
Now just crop his dad out and add it to the spank bank.
i just watched a 27 minute video about owls...that high.
It is NEVER not funny to me when I am sitting at a table and I've touched the dicks of every single person I'm sitting with.
I need a sign that says “please don’t make plans with me if I’ve had two or more drinks. I will regret them. I will have bitter feelings towards you. Then I will cancel and feel guilty.”
Randomize
