I went out, and slept with my sunglasses on
Honestly I wish you never came into my life. I know I don't want you. But I keep trying to get you back bc of the memories
I don't see you I see the memories. All the time
I have had it with that bitchy sack of crazy. Iam done!
i opened her purse and found 4 bottles of vodka tampons and an unopened box of birth control...
Ryan just walked out of his frat house with a case of beer, a 6 dollar bottle of vodka, and a pillow. He's good to go.
I would like to apologize for making you the target of my "I wish head hair grew as fast as Pubes speech" the other night
Alright I don't know how you'll link it to me but yes I left a nearly empty 12 pack on your trunk
Just got a free shot w my beer...it's not quite 11am yet...I love international travel. These people aren't judgmental.
You won't wear your Santa suit, I can't get trashed, and you won't use handcuffs! This is the worst Christmas EVER.
im in the library and there's this guy on a computer just staring at a google image of beer. finals week is rough.
Bobbing for jello shots in a bucket of long island. Fast track to alcohol poisoning.
Henceforth: booty calls will now be referred to as "deliveries of anatomy". That is all.
So I had sex in the woods today. Anything else that happened today? Irrelevant. It was a GOOD day.
my nose is crying tears of wow.
I need to align my fucking chakras
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