Sometimes I wonder if my friend studies mystic Christian theology because he's afraid to come out of the closet. Evidently, it's okay to talk about God coming inside you, but not to say the same about dudes.
No touching my privates on the ride to school. Pinky swear.
Just passed an anti-circumcision dude with a sign. Handing-out-bibles guy has been officially one-upped.
jacking off on stolen wireless... gotta enjoy the small things in life
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i had the all of mcdonalds chanting USA as he motorboated you
we decided to do a scavenge hunt for ourself for when we walked back to our apartments. We hid taco bell behind some bushes. I think they are still good.
he got a charlie horse midthrust which triggered my orgasm we're still sorting this out.
You three are like the Bermuda Triangle for morals.
I mean turning down birthday sex is never the answer
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So I walk in and he's teaching someone in London via Skype how to roll a blunt. I have new found respect for him.
just yelled CURVEBALL at my nightie because it turned out to be a pair of shorts
I'm drunk listening and crying to Selena. How's your Monday?
There is a moment when you wake up with a butt plug in when you question your choices in life.
There is also a moment when you wake up in a kiddie pool of jello cubes where you question what the fuck you did last night. Are you still in the attic or did you go home.
she was just meowing in the corner eating frozen chicken nuggets
and by running errands I mean eating an entire bag of milanos by myself in the Walmart parking lot
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