So we made editble underwear with fruit roll ups and fruit by the foot
Five girls, one freshman pledge. We're like our own Make A Wish Foundation.
This guy just walked into class and first thing he did was grab the garbage can, walk to his desk and say "just in case"
nothing like a tattoo of a large eagle attacking a small eagle whos attacking a shark to bond to siblings together for life
I'm skipping the 'hey, how are you, I have to pick up something pointless at your apartment' excuse and just telling you I'm coming over to fuck.
Wow thanks 4 throwing jello at me an yelling who invited that guy to all the guys at the bar
It's a given that you're going to get peed on at a country concert
my mom was by far the drunkest one there. best impromptu wednesday afternoon party ever
At least I look tastefully trashed. My nipples are hidden and I'm standing up.
He simply fell in the fire, rolled out and continued to finish his bottle of vodka. Everyone else instantly sobered up just watching it.
So because I'm off tomorrow that means your dick could be in my mouth majority of that time
It's rum buckets o'clock
Maybe they'll dismiss me from jury duty after they smell beer on me. You can't keep me in a cage and then give me an hour and a half long lunch break next to a beer fest and expect sobriety.
Our faces when the strip club was closed looked like the grinch just stole Christmas ☹️
You don't need yoga. You need a boyfriend! Trust me I've become all sorts of flexible this past year.
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