The more I sober up, the more sick I am/realize how weird dancing around a wine bottle was
we did it on the carpet and she just yells out "OH. MY PSORIASIS".
the bar tender told me i could keep an air matress in the backroom.
Is it awkward to ask someone I've slept with to officiate my wedding?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She gives pretty bad head, but when it's in her dad's Lexus SUV it's tough to complain.
I'm love that we're talking about a possible 3rd 3some, and that you're going to be a dad.
I'm not judging you... I'm judging our friendship
I mean it was like cry my eyes out or masturbate in my moms bathroom.
A BJ like that needs to be recommended.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think all the stress in my life right now can be directly correlated with never winning a game of Bop It as a child.
ever had one of those days where you say fuck it and lick the inside of a bag of chips
I’m almost positive this girl is drinking a mojito in class right now, if so she’s my new hero
I'm sorry that running around town like a frenetic wombat trying to find you KY jelly isn't good enough for you.
Dude, exfoliate your balls. you'll thank me later.
Look. All I'm saying is that if the USWNT can win a shit ton of medals and have two gay love stories with happy endings, there's still hope in this world
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