Ok pretty sure I just saw Mike O'Malley walking through the parking lot. I wanted to see if I followed him, would he lead me to the acro-criag, i've always wanted a crack at that bitch.
Literally just stood in the shower and forgot what to do. that hungover.
day 8: i just gave goat a piece of pineapple soaked in rum. as an animal science major, im ashamed. as a normal person, it was awesome.
she named each of the players on the last ten madden covers in order and then shotgunned 2 beers...if she doesnt have a penis im in love
she blew me in the men's room in the restaurant. it was a french bistro, so it was okay
It's end St Patricks day. I'm gonna need a leash. And a bib. And a rain check on anything considered dignifying.
Operation: sleep in every bed at the boys' house is nearing completion. Now at 5/9. I AM GOLDILOCKS AND NO ONE CAN STOP ME
Get in your clown car, pick up everyone you know, and head to the park. drunk Sledding grand prix tonight. winner takes home the leftover beer
I've never been more scared for my virginity in my life. And I lost my virginity almost 6 years ago.
Apparently when it was last call I jumped up on the bar and told everyone to get the fuck out, which was immediately followed by a round of applause from the bouncers/bartenders and my tab getting paid as well.
Maybe next year when I'm 30 I will be over puking at lunch on Fridays. Maybe
She ran from her surprise party screaming "I'm not ready for an intervention." Yeah, the girl has a problem.
Had to take him to the ER for not only alcohol poisoning but for stepping on a firecracker. Happy 4th holy fuck
I wish I could send you one of those donuts I had. Like teleport it to you. Because it would change your life
He was publicly touching my boobs before I even knew he's a famous World Cup skier.... That's how hot he was
Randomize
