the crunchwrap supreme is the def leppard of the taco bell menu
which is why it's clearly superior
remember when jerking off was fun and not a neccesity
Girl in front of me has spent the class alternating between playing farmville and the tiffany's website looking at engagement rings. Every once in a while she holds her hand up to the screen.
She doesn't deserve the breathe the same air that we do.
She just bought a cow and we've moved on to looking at wedding dresses.
so i used to love airports for the escalators... now its the bars... then the escalators after the bars
i am doomed to only fuck guys with curved cocks
people are starting to question the shark bite story
Apparently we were just playing "bang a bridesmaid". I'm not sure if I won or lost...
I do wanna see you. And we can just lay here and watch a movie and listen to me cry.
The worst decision I made last night was allowing myself to be duct taped to the ceiling
Will i get arrested If i steal the salvatiion arny guys bell for ringing it to close to my hangover
Oh Julie took your pants off last night, I put your pajama bottoms on, and Rachel took your bra off. It takes a village.
How do we have all these hot friends who we never do body shots off of
I swear the toilet was so cold I tried to stand up but my balls wer frozen to it. most awkward five minutes between me and my mom.
I got my nipples pierced. If you haven't seen my boobs in the past week, you're among the minority
I wanted to write an apology letter to my vagina after that.
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