The only thing I have to prove last night happened is a fireman's hat full of puke.
I drank mimosas and played bocce ball in the middle of finals week...now i know how Comm majors feel all the time.
well my dad not being home definitely made it less awkward to walk in carrying the bra I left wearing.
Does anyone know who that girl who fell backwards and broke the shoe rack with her head was?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
well let's see. after you forcefully shoved a half-eaten apple in my mouth, you ruined the pepsi by dumping an entire beer in there.
now that you've tased me I refuse to buy you flowers
All I want to do is fuck in the bell tower before it leave this school. Is that too much to ask?
Maybe STDs were invented to keep stupid people from having kids.
DOGS JUST TOTALLY ATE THE FEATHERS OFF MY NIPPLE CLAMPS!!!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sorry I got completely naked in your bed, but I feel our friendship has grown because of it.
How do you delicately ask if your friend's dad was arrested for solicitation of prostitution?
I just found 20 dollars in my vibrator box. Was it a drunken sign to myself to get more?
Everything is bullshit and I hate everyone
My boobs weigh the same amount as 25 pancakes
I just apologized to a wet floor sign i walked into.
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