I want to kish your cheek
My cheeks are in Michigan
Oh my lips are kind of stretchy
I just put out an orange level terrorist threat on her punani
...., I just tried brushing my hair wothh a toothbrushg. fail
ps not my toothbrush awkward.
i don't mind that he's uncut. i like it! it's like a little sweater!
a cock doensn't need a sweater! especially a skin sweater! wtf.
That's like some buffalo bill hannibal lector shit.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the realtor just took us to a house I had a one night stand in. I feel like it's a sign.
A kid in my class brought a George Foreman and cooked food mid lecture. When the prof found out, all the kid did was ask if he wanted some.
Pretty sure I just shit out pure stomach acid. I'll explain after you take me to a hospital
I broke down outside of an all boys correctional facility
well if that's not a gay porn waiting to happen, i dont know what is...
It really went downhill when you started writing IOU on pieces of napkins. Giving them to the strippers
Real life dumb and dumber
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Prerry sure I narrowly avoided being tazed by a swat cop last night... But on the up side, we found my purse.
Successfully defrauded the county government. What have you done today?
We went camping and met these lesbians and now I have S'mores where there shouldn't be S'mores.
her fuck buddy was butt ass naked in our kitchen making waffles but they tasted so bomb
He sent me a dick pic from a port-o-potty in Boston. If that's not love Idk what is.
so at target i bought condoms, on sale undies, pasta roni, and martini mix. the old lady who rang me up asked "honey are you a freshman?" yea lady i am, thanks.
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