What did you want me to do? You know I don't like fat people. I'm an asshole to them sober it only gets worse when I'm drunk
That doesn't make it okay! You tried kicking the girl's mom out where we were having the party at!
everyone who works at gamestop is basically destined to live with their parents for the rest of their lives... so i said no.
hey sry I lost all my numbers who is this?
pat the guy you slept with
still need a last name
you wouldn't come out from under your bed because you said there were six-armed bears everywhere.
ohhh that explains the pepperonis I found in my sock drawer this morning...
no it doesn't.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
this will be a night to untag.
Missed another period
I almost hope you're pregnant, this is unfair.
I still can't believe you had sex with someone who willingly went by Peaches.
I got an assistant at work. First task was picking me up at a strip club. I was drunk and trying explain how it was work related
Naw but when she was in the bathroom I threw the condom out the window and I'm pretty sure it hit some girl
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Simultaneously sexting while making brunch plans. Multitasking at its gayest.
His dick is curly. It's adorable.
You are not allowed to sing ever again, my ears are still ringing.
I woke up with my shoes on but pants in the fish tank
so does the amount of bruises on my arms and legs mean we had fun last night?
Nah, we’re just sitting around talking about different kinds of boners
Randomize