At Bonnaroo. Just saw a couple emerge from a port-a-potty. Romantic?
Those are some awfully high standards for someone of your weight
i purposely bought her a small sweater. My way of saying, you've gotten fat.
mimosa in my stainless steel water bottle. going green is not that bad.
I don't think he realizes it but he was stroking the faucet while he was talking to me.
thank you for letting me use your house as a brothel.
BTW. If I show up really drunk and dressed a cowboy, don't be alarmed
I'm so glad I got to use the word gutterslut before 11:00a today.
You work today? I woke up with a raging boner that was whispering your name
They have a genuine stripper pole secured to the floor of their living room. I am thoroughly take advantage of it. I've made $5 so far. Why don't more places have poles??!
Btw. Being a stripper for a week without anyone knowing to pay off my school loan is no longer in my agenda.
I apologize for tapping your ass. It was a friendly tap. Like Casper. Ya know
Have you ever just sat there and thought about past penises?
How did I get the fat lip, while puking I may or may not have sneezed... Wacking my face into the toilet bowl...
If you think that liquor is the way to shower sex then you're right.
Randomize
