Shit chicky whatchu wearin rt now, ur skins?
Oh dear, kinda... in ur sweats!
U look good, r we getting naked in ur car?
why do our vaginas work when we are blacked out?? it's just not fair.
i should start naming my morning wood
great idea but wrong number
is it trashy that while he was throwing up in the bathroom, i was hooking up with his childhood best friend?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm never telling my kids not to take ecstasy, never. Idk what my mom was thinking.
1. They have gold fish races every wednesday. 2. They have a redbull vodka slushie. We need to visit this place.
1. My fish will beat your fish. 2. Were getting fucked up
Look, I said I'm sorry. In the shower, "are you happy to see me" sounded just like "could you please pee on me". Honest mistake.
Im tired as fuck but i cant leave him here like this i gave him the acid and i feel the responsibillity to put his mind back together its fun im an architect about to about to construct a whole new belief and moral system inside this soul. Talk about the best psychothearpy
The best part of my day was getting high in the parking lot of the movie theater and taking pics in the photo booth with the caption "CONGRATULATIONS!" we geeked out because it congratulated us for getting high
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Next think I knew I was pretty much using his penis as a microphone... No more playing Eminem during hookups
Ok because I want to set a new world record for how fast I can drink away my Christmas money
I don't even have his number. I have his pants tho
Never let your siblings swipe right.
i think we reached that point in our drunkenness where even the creeps found us intolerable
Wait... where the hell did you even find a live OCTOPUS, let alone green eggs and ham?
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