so she proceeds to puke everywhere, look up at me like a sick dog, and then say, "i'll finish if you want me to."
he's my edward cullen
I am pretty sure Edward Cullen never had an all-day drinking binge topped off with some blow.
i just heard a guy call his kid "Google" in a way that leads me to believe that's his name. this day couldn't get worse.
I don't know what happened last night but I woke up this morning with "wolf pack" tattooed on my knuckles.
Is it bad when your hot neighbor is crying on her porch, and your 2nd thought is "maybe her boyfriend cheated on her and she'll want to fuck me for revenge sex?"
Perfectly normal.
Dude give me 4 good reasons we shouldn't trade girlfriends tonight
LEAVE MY LITTLE DICK OUT OF THIS
I'm gonna eat you out with that hat on so it looks like beaker's doing it. And I'm gonna go "memememememe"
Hey, met you at the bar last night. You probably dont remember my name. You and your friends came back to my place, you shattered my window with your fist then dipped. Your gonna need to pay for that.
Thats where this cut came from! Thanks for piecing together the puzzle dude.
Just realized I used a picture of my little sister to holler at a guy, only 3 months old and she's already my wingman.
I went through my entire iTunes library and made a playlist called "Feelings". I have 7.5 hours of feelings.
I just fucked her in the corner of an ally while holding a large pizza waiting on a pledge for a ride.
it was like reliving my childhood drunk at a bar.
I'm that daughter that had to send her mother "DON'T GET SHITFACED" & yes, in ALL CAPS.
How much of a thot would I be if I put this pic up? On a scale of thot-ish to Queen of Thotlandia
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