Guess who is high enough to buy Jingle All The Way?
I'll put it this way. My grandkids felt that fuck.
This guy just showed us his webbed feet to prove that his son was actually his son
In the middle of switching positions, we shared a line of coke. It's was like a modern-day 'Lady and the Tramp.'
i was about to rearrange the room but realized that this is the only efficient setup where we can have sex while the other one's asleep without them accidentally seeing.
What would you say if I got first degree burns on my nipples from drinking coffee topless?
Tequila shots with cinnamon and orange write it down before I forget
she passed out facedown in my lap while I was playing piano. 11 years of piano lessons finally paid for themselves.
Is it mean to convince my old booty call she used me for sex so I can bang her again before I leave for Denver?
There's a person in my phone named motor boat. I love making new friends.
he told me he could still feel the blowjob i gave him last year
wow. THAT good huh
It's disgusting. He breathes through his mouth and just sounds fat. Plus he chews all loud and shit.
Can you tell dad to stop liking and sharing porn on FB again?
Allow me to explain. Triple D is a surprise. It's like if you're expecting to fight one person, then you get ambushed by more. Except it's a good ambush, because it's boobs, not death.
My first hangover at work. I'm officially an adult.
Randomize
