Do you think you have hit the lowest point in your life when you find yourself actually condisering watching the movie "Gigli"?
singing on the bus should be illegal
huh?
There's a group of like 8 white people in the back of the bus harmonizing to sugar we're going down
just threw the rents a curveball by making french toast and bacon when i came home sober. good luck tellin when im high/drunk now.
Scott woke me up by cracking a beer open in my face. Best friends are awesome.
Too many sundays start with me waking up still drunk in my car.
You know how girls with huge tits have back problems? Do you get knee problems or something?
College has taught me that the "best idea" is rarely the fun one.
This is true but you can't really get fired from college
I'm calling it the Friendlationship with Benefits Zone.
I'm just saying, no one has ever made me laugh or cum as hard as you do. Sometimes at the same time which I didn't know was possible. Is there even a word for that besides love?
He talked to you for like two seconds while you were shit faced doing Forest Gump impressions...how is that possible?
Spent 20mins wondering why my roommate wouldn't answer after we were pounding on the door.....Def went to the wrong building.
Noo.... Like in the attic of a crack house with nitrous and fat chicks weird....
I'm home, and it turns out she didn't get it all. still picking Oreos out of my pubes.
I'm over here trying to figure out how to get shake shack delivered to my bed and Jamie is having a child
i woke up to drewlling on a plate of eggrolls half naked halfway between my bed and the floor, and i have no idea where my pants went
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