I was staring at you from my window across the quad. I wanted to let you know so it's not creepy
did you know you can prarie-dog a fart??
I told him I had my daily dose of vitamin c so i wouldn't blow him
So you used a whole package of smoked meat last night. Didn't eat it, just took it out and put it all over the fridge.
I want a picture of impoverished children wearing Oregon national champions shirts.
Yes, I feel sorry for the tribe that gets those. They won't be able to hide from the lions.
Just start grabbing cocks. It can't go wrong! Just say you thought you knew him and wanted to check.
Europe's "the final countdown" was playing. It was pretty much amnesty for anything that might happen the rest of the night. It's a rule.
Haha, you avoided her at all costs. And then she shoved her tits in your face
Drinking Fireball means never having to say you're sorry. Unless its at you're arraignment.
I'll have you know my trust issues and my daddy issues are two COMPLETELY different topics of conversation.
Signs of a stoner: trying everything in your fridge topped with peanut butter to seek satisfaction.
If you're with any of them tell them i apologize for (insert whatever i did here)
For someone I see at the bar by herself all the time... I should have know she had a tazer.
I just broke into my house with a butter knife. It kinda scares me just how easy that was.
It’s awful. They need to open the bars. I’m now trolling grocery stores looking for dick
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