Someone's got a whale tail
A thong is hangin out?
No, a fatty following them
Omg. There's def a kid, like 10 years old, sitting in a buggy at wal mart holding a sign that reads "I can't behave"
It was confusing and full of hummus
We've got 2 weeks of college left-I want to feel like Gary Busey by graduation.
I was trying to be really smart and save 10 dollars for each cab there and back. ...so I ripped a $20 dollar bill in half.
He said he wouldn't use a condom because he didn't want to kill anymore trees.
I recommend just blowing him. It's always the way to go.
I gotta figure out which 7 tampons in the box contains the drugs
Can you explain the plethora of sunflower seeds in the dryer?
Did you fuck him in my garden last night?
That WOULD explain the dirt in my vagina
The best part of Easter was watching all his colorblind cousins try to find the eggs.
I'm going to get high and eat ice cream until the pain goes away. You're welcome to join.
Which president had the biggest dick?
Take your time, I'll wait
I noticed it at one point and thought do I really wanna bang the guy with the phone holster .....of course I do
I swear to god, no guy has been as interested in sticking stuff up my butt as this girl
Randomize
