): 100 percent naked, unless you count a tiara as clothing.
The best thing happened. Some guy was butchering Conway Twitty at karoke and the power went off in the whole bar. And someone shouted "you pissed jesus off when you messed with conway!"
you just used "cock block" and "youth group" in the same sentence. somethings wrong with you.
you yelled "you will never make love to jesus" and then ran into the tv.
i told the doctor i drank a college amount of alcohol. judgemental prick
I don't believe u have enough text space to describe the dimensions of his penis.
Correction... Drunk on winter break. There are no days of the week on break.
I want to be your penis for a week.
I got laid while wearing a shirt with a picture with my little brother deep throating a banana on it.
She complimented my boobs and then told me I smelled like teddy bears before falling asleep on the floor.
Sorry, It's like OkCupid Olympics... categories: best sext, best dick pic, and most effort by ugly. You won gold in the last event if that makes you feel better.
just got permission to expense a nerf gun
Sorry if that was awkward, i will never call you sober ever again
Dude, someone puked in my washing machine last night, I tried turning it on to clean it...not a good idea
He just blew a .079. Jesus loves him THAT much.
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