I just put my retainer in and it tastes like weed
im the poster child for why you shouldnt play beer pong with wine.
i think i have that disease where you wake up in strange places drunk.
I fell asleep with my vibrator still in me. I am the Queen of Sad Masturbation.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We sat on the porch laughing about hilarious the sunrise was. And that we can do drugs again in the morning, thank god
My birthday is in 11 days. Going ham. Consciousness will not be an option
Here's the thing, you got road head in two different cars tonight. You feel lucky yet?
you were afraid hed set himself on fire so you dumped a box of baking soda on him
Does buying my brother condoms for Christmas say "keep having sex with her, I like her" or "dear god, do not get this girl pregnant"?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Once again I am on the toilet and refuse to get up
What a great time to reflect on life
I don't remember how I broke my nose last night, but I woke up with dried blood everywhere. Also, you should tell that guy how you feel.
Be safe. If you have intercourse with a boy use so many condoms this his penis is no longer recognizable.
I pretended to be blind and he pretended to be my assistant and long story short, we had to buy that bra and panty set, and now we're both banned from Victoria's Secret AND I have a cum stained demi cup.
I went to Christian school in the 90s. I can finger blast anything, but dignity.
He’s definitely circumcised. There’s not enough room in those speedos for a foreskin with that fire hose he’s packing.
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