New record: 45 minutes. Afterwards I played We Are The Champions while we cuddled.
eating raw peppers to burn the taste of semen out of my mouth
the mandatory saturday morning class for those written up by RA's turned into a gold mine...just met EVERY hot chick that parties.
he just kept repeating that I have nice areolas
You were pretty fucked up... decided playing hopscotch down the stairs was an excellent idea.. it was extremely entertaining
being alone eating nachos and drinking from a giant munchen beermug really isnt that sad
Then he told me he was proud of me for remembering that i blew him that night.. Maybe my drinking is getting out of hand.
No, I've only ever seen his brother's dick. So when I have lucid sex dreams, I just do a little cut and paste in my mind and stick his bro's package onto him.
My vagina can tell he is in a metal band. I dont know if I can sit down.
Oh god. I finally realized why the coked out Stevie wonder was explaining the concept of movember to the McDonalds clerk. Drunk me didn't process that another month comes after Halloween... It's apparently November.
One guy got his nose broke and was playing with it. Then another guy was playing beer pong off his horse.
So you're on like a list there now..."Do not under any circumstances give this person a knife. Serve them in plastic cups ONLY"
I have peed in a lot of sinks
If I get the job, I'm gonna get wasted to celebrate. If I don't get the job, I'm gonna get wasted to forget. Win-Win
Every time I look at him 'Relax' by Frankie Goes to Hollywood plays in my head. Is that weird?
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