areee we human. . .oorrr areee we dancerssssss?!
you srsly need to quit going to that bar
Last night he was fingering me with one hand to his ear, calling himself 'dj clittles'
Thats what happens when go home with guys that wear shutter shades to the bar..
when we were having sex and i started crying and telling you i missed you..why couldnt you stop and tell me how you felt or make me feel better?you kept going...
my little brother got his license today.. too early to ask him to DD?
Everything is bigger in Texas. Including Colt's vagina.
I just got a high school volleyball teams practice cancelled because I slept with the head coach through their practice time.
Just bought all my wine for the weekend with a check at 11am. I'm almost judging myself.
Yessssssssss. I got taped to a couch last night apparently. I also thought i was close to scoring after talking to some chick about hard boiled eggs
Quite frankly, I consider the fact that I'm NOT pregnant one of my greatest achievements and I'd like to chronicle that ongoing success. I'm going to post pictures of me at "0 weeks" once a week.
He ate me out like a beaver on a tree. I've never been so scared in my life
I sent you a snap of me in the bath, and you sent me a snap of a taco. An actual taco.
The only joy I have here is being able to shit with the door open.
Turns out he's actually a she. Might keep dating her just to see Mom's reaction.
I woke up with an eye patch on, someone else's sweatshirt on, and no pants on. I hope it was a good night.
Can we throw a "death to my 20s" party when I turn 30?
Sure. Funeral attire and hard liquor
Randomize
