I have a pretty basic diameter of my vaginal abyss. I'm sure it won't hurt.
how could I be having a bad time, I have the three most important things in life: Goat cheese, Xanax, and Saved By the Bell Re-runs.
ok 1 i realized people actually live in central wisconsin and 2 culvers could be a good place to pick up chicks today
not allowed to tweet this cos she's following me but i definitely just got head in a stairwell of the university of chicago. wanted you all to know.
Is it socially acceptable to order two burrito bowls?
anything's socially acceptable if you do it with enough confidence
I have the Lakers game on, but all I can think about is having sex with you. Not sure what you've done here.
There are no words to adequately express my gratitude for sending me porn you found staring a former classmate.
Is this like a "I'm taking you out to dinner and treating you with respect" kind of date, or is this a "I'm gonna fill you with alcohol and cheese and stuff my dick in your anus" kind of date?
Do you know what your brother wants for his birthday?
Yeah he said he wants a decent blowjob for a change.
.......
I'm just looking out for you.
I think they were making kool-aid in my bed. There is lots of sugar and my hands and face are stained blue.
I just had really awesome sex bent over the side of an air hockey table. That is all. Happy thanksgiving.
There is a guy in class using a wine bottle as a water bottle. Welcome to the Faculty of Environment.
He's like a computer from 2001 in a 2014 world. It just doesn't work. Lots of glitches.
Hey! Happy Birthday! Could you do me a favor and bring my underwear to the bar?
What happened last night?
Lets just say you asked me a couple times if you had eyeballs..
Randomize
