hi brent please bring bad word music cd must most bad word please brent bring cd music bad word please brent bring cd music bad word
He should be on Bizare Foods after who he ate last night
i just licked mashed potatoes off my blackberry. i'm not even ashamed to admit that to you.
im giving 12 year olds life advice. this is probably illegal somewhere.
I just ate a whole bag of celery instead of getting up to get a glass of water. That high.
I feel like you pissing on my ping pong table isn't something to be proud of.
oh and then you called a time out with your penis
He asked me if we could throw a lingerie party together so I guess he's single again
I didn't plan on sleeping with him until he told me his mom is deaf.. Then I felt bad.
I'm going to have to start playing roller derby again so I can blame my sex-related bruises on that.
I'm bored enough im considering taking up his offer to turn me straight just to kill time until the lasagna is out of the oven
I want to just live in between your butt cheeks.
Sangria Flip Cup was probably one of our worse drunken decisions
Well now you know not to take drugs from your friends. Take it from stangers. They're more reliable.
Wait, I'm confused. I EMPTIED the bottle? as in consumed it? I'm impressed with myself.
Randomize
